12/15/2012 (Every Day ....)

Is the Worst Day of My Life.

Yes every day is the worst day of my life. 

Poker updates, who the fuck cares.  Really I'm incapable of typing anything worthy or meaningful about poker right now.   So moving on...

I decided to invite a girl I'm interested in to come visit for the weekend.  I mean why the fuck not right?  What else am I doing better on Saturday?  Averaging like $35 per hour?  An average that never actually happens anymore.  I'd probably be broke at this rate in about a year, or just sustaining enough to live not really building shit, or rage out and do something really stupid.  So when all else fails, might as well enjoy the perks of being a live poker player.  Call the girl, set up the rooms, go out, have fun, act like you have a real life for once.  Then maybe get some confidence and motivation and pick up the grind next week (yeah right).

But every day is the worst day of my life.

So I already know what is going to happen Saturday.

The girl is 100% going to flake out.

Then I'm going to be like "ok all good, great I'm just going to grind Saturday and Sunday."

But in actuality I'm going to be so pissed off that I'll start tilting on top of being permanently live doom-switched (for over 2 months straight out of no where), hemorrhaging a stop loss minimum Saturday night.  Why will I be pissed off?  Because now I'm actually looking forward to taking off.  And I don't have a back-up plan because I didn't consider a being flaked out on insurance (which you need to have when every day is the worst of your life).  Anyways, can't wait.  Cheers to another fucked month.

-bag