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After many years of going to school and saying no to drugs I graduated with a degree!  Little did I know it would lead me to being beaten into the ground at the hands of a soulless corporation.  After 3 years I quit to play poker professionally.  I've now been full-time over 7 years, yet revenge is still in the air.  It's crazy to look back and realize I started this blog as I was simply 'pumping myself up' to quit the real world and go full time.  Now I also do some writing for fun as a 'day job' (some freelance and paid, but an insignificant sum compared to 5/10 live) and airbnb my place when I don't feel like playing as much.

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Saturday
Feb062016

I'M BACK! (2/6/2016)

During the past few years I have pretty much neglected this site.

During that time I have still played poker full time the entire time. I was just in a phase of my life where I was focusing on a few other projects and saw no point in remaining actively public. I also had no desire to remain public or even update the site.

Now in 2016 I can say my focus has completely shifted. I plan to post here at least once per month whether it be strategy or just random nonsense.

I still play live occasionally, but I'm currently putting most of my volume online in NJ. Mostly in the MTT scene right now. 

I play on the three major sites in NJ under these names:

WSOP: Defender

Party/Borgata: Defender85

888 NJ:  Axelife

I'm currently ranked in the top 100 for all MTT players in NJ (source pocketfives). During the next ranking release I should be in the top 50. So I'm not playing completely horrible all of the time.

It's been a strange transition from mid/high stakes live cash to online MTTs. About a year and a half ago I almost completely quit poker and decided to give online one more shot full time since it has recently become legal in NJ.  But that wasn't enough, I NEEDED TO LEARN A NEW FORMAT to keep things interesting. So I did just that with the MTTs and I'm feeling a 2nd wind, or I guess 4th wind in my case!

Even cooler news, I'm planning to release some training videos publically on youtube where I record my sessions in real time. I'm doing this in an attempt to help other people interested in getting into poker for free without being fleeced by coaches or poker training sites that charge too much. I also think this is a way to keep poker interesting to me. 

I've already done a lot of the hard work and have created many training videos. I've just been procrastinating with some of the easier steps such as working on the youtube channel, etc, etc. 

At the end of the day procrastination is a success barrier. However, I don't look at it as a source of shame. I think as I gradually and strategically expand my landscape I will be able to tolerate more as a person. The procrastination is the result of emotional truama from doing so many new things at once. I embrace this trauma. The struggle is improvement.

After many years of senseless struggles on and off the tables I now see emotional trauma as a clear indicator that I'm on the right path. This means I am challenging myself to eventually achieve a vision of an 'ideal existence.' I am truly disgusted by comfort. To embrace pain is life itself.

Looking forward to the best year yet, hope everyone is fantastic!

-baglife

(aka: Defender/Axelife)

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