I came into Monday looking forward to grinding out a session, nothing out of the ordinary.
Out of nowhere I proceed to lose -$1000 in 2 fucking hours. What can I say? Good times losing 20% of my months profit in two hours. i'm starting to hate the game again thanks to tonight. At least I had the discipline to walk away at the -1k stop loss I have daily.
I haven't had to actually use the stop-loss in 2 and a half months.
Tonight was a horrific disgusting mind-fuck of a downward fluctuation in a incredibly short time. I was fine with the way I played. There was the usual -$100 getting blinded and losing every possible situation.
Then I join a new table. Get dealt AsKs, two callers. POT $60. Flop Ks 3d 4h . I bet $40, 1 fold, BTN raises to $85. I call. Unfortunately this is a deep-stack unknown player. The raise is either nuts or some sort of Kx. He was a younger guy so I thought there was a good chance he wasn't nutted here.
TURN 2s
I check, he checks. I was planning to check raise the turn, but now I'm pretty much check calling any river unless the flush comes in.
RIVER Jx
I check, dip-shit bets $140 into $160 I call.
He has KJo. Sweet great start.
I then switch to the most profitable table in the casino, there is a well known fish there.
I take a disgusting cooler against a mid-stack almost immediately. BOARD: A Q 4. I cbet 90 into 140 on the flop multi-way with AK. Mid stac limper check raises to 80 more all in. He of course has A4 after limp calling my 35, and holds, why not.
Soon after I get AK again (lol). Raise again.
FLOP A 2 2 multiway.
I bet 40 into 60. Mega-fish calls, 1 fold.
TURN K
I bet 100 into 140. Fish thinks and raises to 300.
I push in 90 more all in.
River x
Fish has 52o
There goes 1k
there goes an above average month.
I'm fine getting the final 290 in on that board against the fish. I have to be good like 29% of the time. I beat plenty of his Ax, but I lose to his 2x combos. Tough session. Going to take off the rest of the night, I'm obviously never even close to recovering from that in 6 hours, or even 50 hours knowing me, so whatever. I don't trust myself to continuing playing after I'm already down a thousand in a session, that's why I have the stop loss.
And this is part of the evaluation period. If I can really deal with this bull-shit another year, or 3 years for that matter. Maybe I should just get into commercial real estate through a family connection. If I work hard in that area I don't have to worry about losing 20% of my monthly profits in two hours. Then maybe go back to poker when I have a 50k+ bankroll so this stupid shit doesn't stress me out as much. If I can't deal with nights like these I shouldn't be playing pro.
Hopefully it will be another 2.5 months before I lose -1k in 2 hours on a 2/5 table. But the scary thing is I have no control over it. IT could happen tomorrow. And how long I can be ok with that I'm not sure.